Saturday, May 31, 2008

Confurrrrvative Internet tough guy loves skunks, hates negroes

Funny story Liberal Avenger passed on to me. All week long conservative pundits have been jumping on Obama for a mistake he made about his uncle's service in WWII. Obama said his uncle helped liberate Aushwitz, turns out it was Buchenwald. Huge mistake, amirite? In the words of one particularly retarded pundit, "Aushwitz was a death camp, while Buchewald was MERELY a slave labor camp" [were prisonners worked to death]. Yeah, so much better. Anyway, these idiots started pestering WWII vets with questions about the service of Obama's uncle. Here follows an e-mail sent from a conservative commenter to a WWII vet in charge of military records of servicemen.
—– Original Message —–
From: cigarskunk
To: [mark kitchell]
Sent: Wednesday, May 28, 2008 6:38 PM
Subject: Searching for Charles W Payne

Dear Sirs,

In light of the recent controversy over the military service of Barrak Obama’s grandfather, Charles W Payne, I was hoping to contact you to get some kind of verification of his membership in the 89th.

I’ve checked the records of http://www.kshs.org/genealogis…..p;branch=N and they only list him as being in the Navy.

I would like to get a second source to confirm that Obama is still lying on this subject as my grandfathers, father and uncles all served in WWII, Korea and Vietnam and I don’t particularly care for politicians lying about the service of family members to further thier political agendas.

Thank you in advance!

From: [Mark Kitchell]
To: cigarskunk
Subject: Re: Searching for Charles W Payne
Date: Wed, 28 May 2008 18:52:48 +0200

You are the one who is lying. Mr. Payne (Obama's uncle) served in the 89th Divison, 355th Infantry Regiment, Company K.

Oh snap! I just love how the Internet tough guy tried to be chummy with a soldier and got bitchslapped. Now that would be funny enough, but people at Sadly, No! discovered that the conservative e-mailer is also a FURRY who seems well known in the furry community! More than that, he regularly commissions pictures of himself as a cigar smoking skunk fucking Fifi LeFume (underraged) from Tiny Toons (ED article on CigarSkunk). Even the furries seem to hate CigarSkunk.
From Crush, Yiff, Destroy:
In August, Cigarskunk came to CYD in order to assert his heterosexuality and to explain why the furries hated him: He was 100 percent straight, he smoked, he was conservative, and he brought females to conventions, because he was not gay. He stated, restated, and then stated some more that he really loved women and was totally straight, and then went on to call everybody else gay. Literally; he responded to every negative post by calling the poster a closet homosexual or a homophobe, and he did so in the kind of haughty manner that makes you want to plunge your hands through your computer screen and wrap your fingers around the throat of the person on the other side.

After babbling endlessly that he wasn’t gay and everyone else was, Cigarskunk began to ramble about cigars and how great they were. It was fetishistic: “Cigars, cigars, cigars, by God, I love cigars. My favorite color is cigar-brown. Cigar smoke, cigar smell, cigar taste; cigars are fucking great. I really, really like cigars. Cigars make my day. Cigars have a Zen-like quality to them, and they’re so damn good. Ooh, yes, cigars. I think about cigars all the time. I fucking love cigars.”

Rest assured, by the time his ass was banned in record time (after a mere 3 posts), everyone knew that he really, really, really loved cigars. Afterwards, Cigarskunk pounded out essays of staggering length, detailing how everyone at CYD was a lunatic and all the hate was heaped upon poor little him. Plus, cigars were great. Everyone pointed and laughed.

Isn't that typical? Internet conservative tough guy talks about kicking sand-nigger ass, blames the ills of the world on liberalism, feminists, abortion and atheism. But then is really a fat disgusting geek, even for a furry, who wouldn't even be able to crush a plush toy? Showing again that the most repressed are the most fucked up. You don't see me trying to ban pornography, do you? I remember when one conservative commenter was all hyped up because he had discovered I was a hentai artist. Yeah, real fucking good detective work, Sherlock! Just because you live the life of a repressed hypocrit doesn't mean everyone else does.

At least, unlike his fellow conservatives, the only children he had sex with were drawings. LOL I'm glad he never commissioned anything from me. X-D

6 Comments:

Blogger Sonicdude135 said...

Speaking of being a hentai artist. Where is the new Sister wulfia focka?

HAha but anywho there will always be people like that. People who act like they know everything Despite being so wrong themselves. They really need to invent an internet "Punch Button" because its so danm anoyying when you meet some one so set in their ways and yet you can even so much as reward them with punch =(

5:42 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

The best way to punish them would probably be to ignore them. So I fail there... :-p

Also, the SWF update is ready, but it will be delayed a day or two due to Josh's laptop problems.

7:05 PM  
Anonymous Darlo said...

I think it'd be amazing if it turned out his grandad, dad, 2nd cousin and whoever else DIDN'T serve in a war.

12:17 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Guys like this are usually dealing with issues because they are Latent. Got a TMI overdose on gay sex from a Christian once. He obviously needed to come out of the closet big time.

11:39 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

I had to Google "TMI"... lol

12:02 AM  
Blogger Jack Ruttan said...

You might not like this, but I'm afraid the furry hatred on the web is simply transference from people who find themselves not allowed to hate on the people they used to, in the "good old days."

Gotta find a scapegoat for all that unreasoning bile building up in the system.

12:20 PM  

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