Sunday, May 20, 2007

The Bible: Rated X

Reuters:More than 800 Hong Kong residents have called on authorities to reclassify the Bible as "indecent" due to its sexual and violent content, following an uproar over a sex column in a university student journal.[...]

The complaints follow the launch of an anonymous Web site — www.truthbible.net — which said the holy book "made one tremble" given its sexual and violent content, including rape and incest.

The Web site said the Bible's sexual content "far exceeds" that of a recent sex column published in the Chinese University's "Student Press" magazine, which had asked readers whether they'd ever fantasized about incest or bestiality.[..]

If the Bible is similarly classified as "indecent" by authorities, only those over 18 could buy the holy book and it would need to be sealed in a wrapper with a statutory warning notice.
I don't like cencorship. But in the spirit of concistency, yes, children shouldn't be allowed to read the Bible. Parents freak out because kids watch the Power Rangers, but stories about Noah getting ass raped by his sons, Lot's daughters having sex with dad, king David killing his best general to fuck his wife and Ezekiel eating and shitting the word of God (seriously, he does that), that's cool. I find this story pretty hilarious. I guess Asians have an outsider's perspective on that western religious book and they can see it for what it really is.
There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.
Ezekiel 23:20
Is that furry porn?

29 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yea u are rite, peoples who does not have contact whit something(like a diferent religion) since their born have a diference sense of it when they seen. Kama Sutra for example its a very usal book in India, but in the ocident its almost porn. The 1000 and one nights too its a classic in the middle east, but we dont associate like they.
Here in brazil(bigest catholic contry) for example If u say than there is almost explicit pornografi on Bible certany the peoples would fuk u off. Diferent peoples diferent thinkings =)
sry the bad english

1:18 PM  
Blogger Johnny Rumble said...

Mildly entertaining and explictitly funny. Porno = Bible.

Johnny Rumble

3:59 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

Oh, an king David is bisexual. Not that there's anything wrong with that. Theologists say that when David says to his best friend who just died, "I loved you like a man loves a woman", it means something else. Yeah right... e_e

4:41 PM  
Blogger terrestialfan said...

Excuse me, but the fact is that the scripture in Ezekiel given was speaking allegorically of the unfaithfulness of Jerusalem prevalent at the time to the Covenant arrangement which God had established with Israel. It is no more pornographic than a newspaper reporting that a rape took place, or a violent crime, or a divorce. It is the act, and not the reporting that is the human problem. Never does the Bible condone terrible things that are done on this earth, but rather it holds out hope that God will indeed take action to put an end to all the badness in Jesus' kingdom rule, which Christians have been praying for and is about to come to pass. Pay heed, and don't try to twist the scriptures for selfish and unholy purposes.

4:47 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

WRONG!
The Bible says Lot was a good man, even though he tried to give his two daughters in sacrifice to a horny crowd and then had sex with them. The Bible also condones slavery (even Jesus) plenty of times.

I don't need to twist the Bible, it's pretty sick and twisted all by itself thank you.

5:21 PM  
Blogger terrestialfan said...

WRONG yourself! If you spent more time studying the scriptures with an eye toward making a friend of and pleasing the most powerful and good Being ever, you would be less inclined to spread such nonsense. Try it, you may like it! My first comment still stands!

6:53 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

Yeah, don't let the facts get in the way of your trolling.

7:48 PM  
Blogger Sonicdude135 said...

I know the bible can have some pretty dark things in it. But so is the world we live in. The bible isnt meant to be some childrens books that we read to them before they go to bed so that they have wonderful dreams. Your suppose to be learning from these stories.

I actualy remeber the king david story very well where he sent the general to die in war just so he can get his wife. I actualy remeber having a church class on THAT very story.

your right. You dont have to twist the words of the bible. But are you aware of the lessons its tring to give behind these sick stories??

the bible isnt fairies and magical gnomes with happy endings. they are all related to real life issues.some a little stronger than others.

5:30 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmm. You know Terrestrialfan... I think Sirkowski's got you cornered here:

There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.
Ezekiel 23:20


An underlying context...? An allegorical commentary on human behavior and virtue...? A mistranslation from ancient Armenic...?

FORGET IT!!

It's smut! This particular example didn't just fail the smell test-- it didn't even show up at school!!

9:21 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Its amazing how religious people can just take something like that and somehow deny to themselves the violence and sexuality inherent in these words.
While some of these stories are meant as sonicdude stated to warn away from some actions, others like the girl smitten wit guys wit donkey cocks that cum like horses or the good guy trying to have his daughters gang raped would be counter intuitive in that regard wouldn’t u say? And obviously just amount to pure graphic sex.
Not to mention that this belief that everything good in the world is because of god and everything bad is because of our evil selves is ridiculous its either all some ‘gods’ effect or all from us. Oh and terrestialfan would you please explain how the ‘most good’ being ever condones hating and killing people because of their beliefs and the way they live their lives, needing you to ‘please’ him to get in his good graces, and that you have to suck up to him to get into your heaven. Now Im no theologian but oh somehow it just seems rather strange that the ‘most good’ being ever would be so childish and petty.

2:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.
Ezekiel 23:20

I think it's more along the lines of saying they had big penises than furry porn, sort of like the phrase 'hung like a horse'.

Either way, not the kind of thing you'd expect in a 'holy' book.

11:37 AM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

I'd like to know what I'm supposed to learn from the Bible when God condones slavery multiple times?

12:34 PM  
Blogger Sonicdude135 said...

Cant say exactly. Ill be the first to say im not as educated as I should be. But it could help if I had an example. I honestly dont recall him supporting slavery.

In fact im pretty sure he told Moses to free the jewish slaves didnt he??

im pretty sure you atleast heard that story...

But like I said im not as educated on the matter as I should be. I would need an example.

12:46 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

God told Moses to free the Jewish slaves because they were God's chosen people. The offense to God wasn't slavery itself, it was the slavery of Jews by pagans.

I could give you all the boring Bible chapters, but the Brick Testament does a much better job. ;-)

Instructions on Genocide:
http://www.thebricktestament.com/the_wilderness/instructions_for_genocide/dt05_01p07_01.html

On POWs:
http://www.thebricktestament.com/the_law/prisoners_of_war/dt21_10a.html

On the Purchase of Hebrew slaves:
http://www.thebricktestament.com/the_law/slavery/ex21_02a.html

Slaves must be obedient of their masters, says Jesus:
http://www.thebricktestament.com/epistles_of_paul/instructions_for_slaves/1tm06_01.html

2:12 PM  
Blogger Sonicdude135 said...

Well As I said im not as educated as I should be but from what I gathered from what you gave me in those links the only thing I can really determine is that its a testiment of Faith. true he said how slaves should act and be treated but I never read anything saying that he discriminated them. He never said that once all is done that they will burn in hell or anything. there just gonna have a rough life and must endure it. and in the afterlife maybe heaven will await them.

But to be honest thats a half assed answer. ever sinced I moved I havent really had a bible handy and as I have noticed from the links you gave me. There are alot of passages missing he just takes specific ones out here and there. people like that guy only tend to take out the juicy things and leave out the stuff that mite give real meaning or answers. and im not sure (correct me if im wrong) but all the passages seemed to be his translations and not word for word from the bible.

If I wanted to give you a true answer for all those situations id have to read them myself. not some guys interpretation off the internet. but in all honesty im not gonna really give the time and day to find out.

Now I dont mean to be intolerant as you have said. But I chose my path and I only have one life, and im not gonna spend it trying to convince the world that my way is right. especialy when I, in all honesty am searching for the answers myself. But if some one does want answers and I can give them, then I may try to help, but im not gonna fight over it. But if theres one thing I do believe is that no one on this earth is gonna have True knowledge till after they are dead.

now you did spike my interest and these are things I would like to look into and find for myself. But I am by no means in a hurry for them. or gonna loose any sleep over it. But sometime in the future I will probably try to find an answer.

and I mean you no disrespect, and hope you dont feel im attacking in any way.... Just trying to give you my 2 cents.

But I DO have one question out of curiosity Id like to ask you if yu dont mind.

Now you sound actualy kinda educated in these matters but Id like to ask if you actualy have a bible that you have read from and gotten your facts from? or do you get your facts off the internet and newspaper and columns written by other people??

once again not trying to attack or prove anything. Just simply curious as to where you get your facts??

annnddd..... im running late for work =P

3:09 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

Believe me, the context is there. Exodus is pretty much genocide after genocide after genocide, when it's not Jews killing each others because they didn't like the taste of mana.

Here's the annotated King Jame's version: http://www.skepticsannotatedbible.com/

4:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sirkowski, please...

Jesus still loves you! So much that he’ll torture you for the rest of time if you don’t choose to accept him this very instant! Hey, that punishment fits the crime, doesn’t it? Surely, he is a just and loving God.

(sarcasm!)

11:18 PM  
Blogger Sonicdude135 said...

uhhmm this will probably be the last thing I say related to this topic, Because I can only talk religion for so long till it gets annoying..

but You dont suffer for all eternity because you didnt accept him this instant. The only people that may burn for eternity in that specific case are those who turned on him. Meaning you First accepted him then turned your back on him in blatant defiance. the ones who never accept him in this life time go to purgatory or limbo or what ever the devil its called when you have to wait. as for the waiting process itself is beyond me

But I would only expect you to know that had you actualy READ the book...

But anyways thats enough debating for me. As I said I dont have all the answer nor ever do I expect to in this life time. So im done talking like I do =P

on a similar note. Wheres my "Sex Sells" book =D

12:19 AM  
Blogger Sonicdude135 said...

Oh and sirk I did check out that link. but only for a little wile. I only checked out the slave thing. and the way I interpreted it was that yes they were enslaved but them lacking riches freed them of temptations of man Like greed, and any other temptations that would come with their freedom. and Im almost certain I read a line that promised them a place in heaven. which from what I am told isnt a bad thing. It also occured to me that the more Recent slaves in america used to sneak out and learn to read. with their knowledg to read they secretly held bible studies. which is a known fact. Im curious what they thought when they came across this little chapter of the book =P ??

But anyways thats just my interpretation of what I read. not to mention I just got off work and am really tired, and browsed through it only once. But I just dont wnat you to think im ignorin what your giving me. Maybe down the road Ill give it a deeper look but im just not that worried about it.

12:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just a thought but wouldn’t agreeing to holding someone in slavery be discrimination in itself? Agreeing to slavery is agreeing to the belief that some people are above others because of (race, religion, origin, wealth, ect). Choose your discrimination basis. :)

1:56 AM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

Sonic, you should get it this week or the next one. Tell me when you receive it.

12:18 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Just the other day I had what happens normally in a coffeshop happen to me at work. A guy went up to my desk with a crazed look on his face. The look you think is a Gacy type who wants to gay rape you and bury you in his crawlspace. But, of course, he was a "Good Christian". Well, I first started questioning him on how fundy he was till we established "Literal letter of the law". Then I asked him if he went to the bathroom. You see, in good old "Leviticus" right near the gay bash there's the commandment to take a spade and march a mile out of town when you need to defecate. And it's more serious than the gay thing. It only calls for murder of gays and calls the act an abomination. On the other hand, not using a spade and marching 1 mile out of town to crap risks damnation for not only you but your community as well. ("Risk losing the favor of the Lord" I think) Of course, some people might say that this is a "Bronze age Taboo" totally superceeded by modern population and plumbing. Then again, them "Liberal secular hyumanists" would make similar excuses not to murder gays. Hey, you oughta use this in a cartoon someday; A whole town (like a midwestern 'city') goes "Fundamentalist" but when someone like me points stuff like this out, they go through with it! Therefore, you have a city with like 100,000 people all literally taking this levitical law to the letter. There is a ring ridge of SHIT surrounding the city and a constant stream of people marching forth and back. It's harder on the old people in the winter, of course. And come spring, many are found thawing out. All bathrooms have been destroyed and people driving risk their vehicle being stoned.

5:37 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

haha! So true!

8:56 PM  
Blogger Sonicdude135 said...

Ok well I Dont know if your still checking this post.

But I finally got time and looked up on the whole slave thing. and Like I said. that guys webpage was HIS lettering. I looked it up in the bible and you do relize where he says "slaves" the bible says "Servents". in fact slave was never even used in any of those books.

Now I dont know if that makes a differance to you but it makes a BIG differance to me. thats all on how you interpret it. the comparison between servant and master can be used as a Boss and employee. and anyone who works under someone else. even jesus was a master and the jews were his servents. if you apply this to those scriptures. you get a whole new meaning.

that guy took something out of context and put in his own words.

Now I dont want to seem like im attacking like I have said. But many times I heard you say not to be intolerate to things. I sure hope you apply that to yourrself and have actualy read the book and not someone else's
interpretation of it, before you start posting things saying such.

Now I Respect your opinion and of course thats only One of the questions you raised in this topic. and I Can't answer all of them. all I can say is read the book and interprit it how you like.

2:52 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

Any theologian will tell you the word "servant" here means "slave".

Remember that the english Bible is a translation and the use of the word "servant" in the King James Version is probably innacurate. The New International Version, which is more modern and more accurate according to most scholars, used the Greek version to come up with "slave".

And even if the passage was aimed at paid servant employees, it would still be pretty disturbing and wrong.

5:54 PM  
Blogger Sonicdude135 said...

well the way I saw It is that if it does mean paid servant to a boss. the main lesson I would get out of that is to appreciate what your getting from the Masters. if your a servent in the tense im thinking of, then you still have "free agency" (which is a topic of its own in the bible) and can leave anytime. but wile you are working for whom ever, you should respect them no matter how hard of a jerk they may be. because they are giving you a means to eat and survive and maybe even currency. if you dont like them then leave. But never disrespect them.

Now I may not be a theologian. but between me and these theolgians. I know that me and neither any of them where there when this book was written. so why should I believe thier translation is correct just cause they say its so.

I also understand that by no means does that make my translation any better

Like I said though. the Jews were refered to as servents under jesus in the bible. and im pretty sure they all werent his slaves, but rather his followers.

it all comes down to how people want to interpret it. people are gonna hear what they wanna hear. and its a battle I fear has no winners. just choose what you want and stick with it.

but if your gonna be like that guy who makes a webpage pointing out all the flaws in the bible. then atleats have the decency to use each scripture word for word and leave the rest up to the readers for themselves to decide. otherwise your just pushing your own personal opinions and translations, and falsley leading people away to what they think COULD be the truth.

9:36 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

Your first paragraph is a perfect description of fascism. The more you try to get around it, the more immoral your interpretation gets.

"it all comes down to how people want to interpret it."

Yes it, if you like to use intellectualy lazy rational and anyway that's a fallacy. Words have meanings and they have a context. You're gonna have a hard time finding any scholars that will agree with your interpretation of what that word means. And yes, scholars know more than you. Some of them might be wrong, but after 2000 years of studying these texts, I'll take their words over yours. It's not like it's the only paragraph that condones slavery in the Bible. There's plenty of precendents. You need more than just an opinion to make a point.

I made an effort to find reliable data to make my point and you just blow it off by making stuff up on the spot. But if you're gonna be bitchy (your last paragraph; you've got some nerve), I'll remind you that you are the Christian here and you're the one who knows the least about the Bible.

Sorry to be blunt, but what you just did really pisses me off.

11:18 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

I never insulted you or your faith at any time. I've always been nice. And I even took the time to research the difference between the word servant and slave in different translations, all in the context of slavery in the Bible.

But in the end, fuck facts and research, it's all about your opinion. You could say this paragraph of the Bible is bullshit, that it's an imperfect book. That wouldn't compromise your faith in any way. But instead you make shaky rationalizations that excuse slavary and fascism and in the end wastes the time I took to find this information for you. Remember that in the beginning you're the one who didn't believe me there were passage in the Bible that condones slavery (the one in Timothy is only one of many). And now that I've shown it to you, you just move the goalpost to an interpretation of the nuances there are between between being a slave and a serf.

I'm done with this.

11:32 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

I'm closing the comments before it gets out of hands.

11:35 PM  

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