Thursday, June 25, 2009

Transformers 2: ROFL

So I'm hearing it's even more boring and racist than the first one? Seriously, I don't understand people who say, "Micheal Bay makes action movies, don't expect Shakespeare". That's the problem. Micheal Bay is a BAAAD action director. Fucking shaky cam, robots who all look the same and absolutly no sense of continuity. Bad Boys was awful. Bad Boys 2 made me feel bad. And I couldn't watch Pearl Harbor till the end. I never saw The Rock and Armageddon and probably never will. I'm not even going to bother downloading a copy of Transformers 2; not worth the time.


Blogger Matt Dusza said...

While I agree Micheal Bay is incredibly over rated (only somewhat enjoyed the 1st transformers, and The Island, Armageddon and Pearl Harbor can rot in hell) I have to sya your really missing out by not watching The Rock. Its a fantastic movie

1:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Not even Megan Fox saved the movie this time. :(

But it's going to be the best grossing movie this summer.

lol u mad?

2:14 AM  
Blogger Kara said...


Just as you heard, it was fantastic!
*dripping with sarcasm*

2:55 AM  
Anonymous Paul said...

LOL. Armageddon. Jeez. We watched that in my high school astronomy class so we could laugh at all of the unrealistic parts. By which I mean, most of the movie.

9:23 AM  
Blogger Kai v3.0 said...

Like the part about slingshotting around the moon (ELEVEN GEES WOULD RENDER EVERYONE IN THE SHUTTLE UNCONSCIOUS) instead of pointing their asses at the asteroid and firing their boosters and landing on it that way?

12:02 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

3 awesome reviews I was sent.
Micheal Bay has finally made an art film.

Transformers 2: FAQ

And from the BBC, what might be the best movie review EVER!

7:53 PM  
Anonymous d19xx said...

Funniest movie I've seen this year. Not because it's witty or anything, it's because of how fucktarded the whole plot is...

2:13 PM  
Anonymous Tainted Ink said...

I didnt see the first one and I wont see the second. as far as I can tell Michael Bay took a giant shit on the best cartoon ever made. I won't reward him for it. When I want to see Transformers I've got my 80s cartoon DVDs.

8:34 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

The Rock *was* a fantastic movie, despite the long odds. even a broken clock is right twice a day.

11:25 PM  
Blogger Kai v3.0 said...

The Rock was good because it had an actual plot, actual GOOD actors, writers who didn't spend half of their budget on porn and only like two explosions in the entire film.

The antagonist was also believable, too. More of an antihero than a bad guy.

12:12 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

getting out of the subject,
when we're going to see more of the manga or the anime?

12:33 PM  
Anonymous Jonas said...

Long time no see, but I didn't feel like sitting in on the Deppression pity party. Live with it.

I personally didn't see the racism, but then again I go to watch moives for the entertainment not to insult people of other races.

Though there was some genuine humor there was also the predictable sex and poop jokes.

I found the action scenes quite good and had no problem believeing that the giant robots were really there trying to kill Shia(who wouldn't be trying to kill him?)
I was actually shocked at how violent the fight squences were, like when Optimus shoves his hand throuh the Fallen's chest and rips out his spark.
I was also pleased that Megatron finally got back to his tank "roots".

The movies is deffinatly worth watching at least once.

7:54 PM  
Blogger Kai v3.0 said...

It's just a shame that the best the movie industry can do is borrow ideas from TV history or completely destroy things that people like.

Sure, sometimes you get successes like with the Harry Potter franchise but that comes from the directors, producers, scriptwriters and actors all having a knowledge of the source material and a desire to stay as faithful as possible.

When you get directors like Michael Bay and M. Night Shyamalan getting their hands on franchise properties, on the other hand, you get quite literally the bottom of the barrel when it comes to intelligent direction and casting.

Granted they both have a couple of phenomenal blockbusters under their belts but it's as if they're forgetting the essential truth: that they are just directors. It's not up to them to write the script or scrounge up funding or actors. They are DIRECTORS. That means that their job, as it relates to the films they're working on, is to set the pace of filming, to make sure that scenes get finished, not to totally reinterpret scripts or series.

It's just plain ridiculous how much freedom they give these people just for having their name attached to a summer blockbuster.

9:03 PM  
Blogger ward said...

The Transformers 2: FAQ is the best thing to read to let you know all you need to know about the movie. It is the most accurate review I've read by far. I should confess I enjoyed the movie, if only for ignoring the Jar-Jar twins, ugh. The only "Wait, Wut?" moments I had during the movie were the underwater scene and every scene involving the Allspark shard or "Matrix of Leadership", but I guess that was because I saw the first movie and knew what to expect. The fight scenes were actually surprisingly good, though, somehow Bay managed to do a few without blowing everything up.

I pretty much second everything Kai said in the last post. Why the hell is Shyamalan doing Airbender?

10:59 PM  
Anonymous Jonas said...

Staying faithful is one thing Kai, but do you actually remember the oringnal G1 Transformers?

Well just for the hell of it I went back and watched them. First thing I noticed and something the die-hard fans bitched about was Megatron's Voice. He sounded like some one rubbing a balloon on a cheese grader, it made my ears want to bleed.
Some people said that the Transformers all looked alike in T2. Ok in G1 every transfromer was made out of a series of boxes and the only real way to tell them apart was by color. Also No one really died in G1, of course later on Optimus had Jesus syndrome and kept coming back from the death every 30 seconds.

Also I heard a lot of people complaining about the Humans and military hardware. First of all its set on earth so there are going to be humans, also in G1 and every retelling/spinoff of the Transformers there is always at least one annoying boy/human hero. As for the Military How the fuck else are we going to fight giant transfroming robots, with Pixie Stix?
If you really think about it the movie was pretty damn faithful to the Original. We know the story of the old Transformers, thats why they gave it a new story so its not the same old shit just with prettier graphics.

The only reason people are ripping on the movies is because they are pissed to see Micheal Bay succeed at something.

I agree with Ward the few WTF moments were pretty out there. Like how they Cannibalized one of their own guys to bring back Megatron(NO not Galvitron, Megatron only becomes Galvitron after being reformated but Unicron, go fuck yourself) and seeing Devistaters Balls. Somehow I felt as if Micheal Bay himself were shoving his own balls into my face.

Still the movie was good, and a lot of this shit you see on the internet comes from people who admit that they haven't seen the movie. You can't review a movie you haven't seen.
IF you just regergate what others are saying your not a critic nor do you have your own opinion, you just another programable fucking drone and you should kill yourself.

From what I have seen of the Airbender Movie, it don't look half bad. And with a Story that good You can't really dick it up unless you really try.

Personally I'm waiting for the Miss Dynamite movie.

PS if you don't like how they do the Movies, go to film school become a director and fucking make them your self.

12:27 AM  
Blogger ward said...

"Like how they Cannibalized one of their own guys to bring back Megatron"

Well, that part in and of itself, made sense to me. The part I couldn't get was the MATH FAIL that was mentioned in the FAQ (5 - 1 + 1 = 6 WTF?!). To me it just seemed like a pretty glaring error and I couldn't get it out of my head for most of the beginning of the film and just ended up shutting my brain off for the remainder.

"PS if you don't like how they do the Movies, go to film school become a director and fucking make them your self."

I don't really consider that a valid response to criticism. I would liken that to saying, "Well if you don't want to get malpracticed, you should spend 8 years in medical school to become a doctor.". I completely understand where a lot of the criticism is coming from. Probably the only reason I'm not that critical is that I honestly wasn't that big a fan of the franchise (I grew with up Beast Wars/Machines, an entirely different era). For example, I totally had no problem ripping Ghost Rider because I actually read the comics. I also reamed Spiderman 3 - which is weird because I generally like Sam Raimi's work. The point is, a lot of what people are saying about the movie is completely valid (although I don't really get all the Shia-hate, I think he's just doing what he's told), it's a movie filled with plot holes and dumb jokes, but I enjoyed it because I tried not to think about what was going and just waited for the next robot battle. It was a guilty pleasure.

1:27 AM  
Anonymous jonas said...

I agree that giant robot battles bring out the little boy in all of us.(egarly awaiting the Gundam movie) In T2 the Robot vs Robot battles were good enough to redeem any screw ups. I too grew up with Beast Wars(hence the referance about Optimus' odd hobby of reformating himself muliple times). I just can't see how people get so attached to something that they cry like babies when someone does or say something they don't like. I loved Beast Wars, I hated Beast Machines, life goes on.

The only problem I had with Spider-man 3 was how unfufilled I felt at the end. They had some much they could have done with Venom but they just kinda half assed it. Plus I wanted to see the Shuddle crash.

As for Shia he is a prick. Not my opninion, in real life he is a prick. He broke off dateing Megan Fox becuase she wanted to play Lego Indian Jones on the Wii. He gave up some of the hottest tail he will ever get because he hates the Wii. Total Prick.(or maybe he is gay)

The only thing that really pisses me off about the Transformers @ movie getting bad wraps is that a majority of the people I have seen slamming it online haven't seen it yet, but they feel that because other people on the internet say it sucks that they themselfs know it sucks.
At least watch the god damn movie before you write it off.

Also someone said on their review that T2 was not worth the $20 they paid to see it. This here tells me they aren't the sharpest knife in the drawer. I paid $3 to see the movie, what retard pays $20 to see a movie?

My point is this movie is NOT G1 transformers, G1 is dead. get over it and try to enjoy something new.

2:18 AM  
Blogger ward said...

"I just can't see how people get so attached to something that they cry like babies when someone does or say something they don't like."

That's kind of what it means to be a fan. When a movie or series is based on a franchise and it isn't faithful, that's basically exploiting the fanbase - who wants that? That's like paying someone to shit on your head.

"As for Shia he is a prick. Not my opninion, in real life he is a prick. He broke off dateing Megan Fox becuase she wanted to play Lego Indian Jones on the Wii. He gave up some of the hottest tail he will ever get because he hates the Wii. Total Prick.(or maybe he is gay)"

Sounds like a bunch of hearsay to me, but I haven't met the guy in real life, so who knows. It's still beside the point, a movie critic should be more interested in his acting than his personal life. All the criticisms I've read about him really have more to do with the script than anything else (like his character and whatnot). I think most of the hate is just residual nerd rage from the movies he's been in recently (Transformers, Indiana Jones).

"At least watch the god damn movie before you write it off."

The only reason I went to SM3 was because a friend invited me. If not for that, you better believe I'd be railing it anyway. There are plenty of movies I don't have to see to know they're bad. Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector, anyone?

4:25 AM  
Blogger Kai v3.0 said...

I like it when people don't read anything I say and just spew more garbage at me than I take out to the curb every Wednesday night.

It's pretty damn awesome to think that I can be totally discounted from believing in rational thought just for having an opinion on how directors should act.

Also no, I haven't seen G1 OR G2, I was never that big of a Transformers fan mostly because you know school was more important than watching a show about transforming robots.

I spent more time outside in those days.

4:02 PM  
Anonymous scarface said...

The rock was voted number 2 out of a 100 of moves or some thing u lest try and see it

1:18 AM  
Blogger Kai v3.0 said...

Was that even English?

I've had more intelligible barf.

1:28 AM  
Blogger I'm Kyhin. said...

It was bad. Not awful, but baaad. I went in there not expecting much, but at least a good action flick.

147 minutes later, I'm walking out of a theatre not knowing what to think. By the time I got home everything processed and I realized I wasted my afternoon. I wont go into detail like I did other places. But yeah, don't go see it.

Sad thing is, everyone I've talked to at work who's seen it, even the people I went with, liked it. Makes me feel alone.

10:26 PM  
Blogger Sirkowski said...

There's a Transformers Google Ad on top... XD

1:03 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Robots in disgrace

4:49 AM  

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